November 06, 2023

What’s new, friends?

I hope you enjoyed Halloween! Did you dress up this year? I went as a “birthday girl” while my husband was the piñata. I’m not sure he appreciated the neighborhood kids hitting him with sticks all night, but the candy I snuck into his pockets might have had something to do with that…🍬😂

Today, we have some luxurious 🪄Harry Potter Palaces that are as magical as they are massive, some reasonably-priced ⛪Former Forums (converted schools and churches), three unique 🪵Cord-wood Cabins, and three Bizarre 🛏️Bed/🛁Bathrooms with tubs right in the middle of the room! Then we head to a home with so much carpet it needs an allergy warning in this week’s ⏰ICYMI, and we’ll finish up with 🗞️Zillowtastrophes in the News.

But first, on to our main event, a massive 12,000+ square foot mansion set on 11 acres in Missoula, Montana, with more bathrooms than there are days of the week. Here, we see the majestic Rocky Mountains in all their glory, plus two detached garages because one just wasn’t enough. 

It’s time to open up this treasure chest. Where should we start? How about the bathrooms? There are no fewer than ten of them, and it’s hard to choose a favorite. Here’s a smattering for your viewing pleasure:

We’ve got lions, leopards, and blood spatter(?)…

A circusy Zebra-themed one with double showers…

Peel-away pyramids (Don’t worry, there are more Egyptian motifs to come…)

And a Victorian tea “potty”…(get it?) …Okay, I’ll see myself out. 

Except I can’t because I’m lost in the mess that is the rest of this mansion, which looks like it was stitched together from every decorating style known to man. 

Every corner of this massive house looks like it came to life from the pages of a different home decor magazine. Take a look at these over-the-top bedrooms…

The basement theater follows the same bizarre Egyptian theme as the above bathroom and bedroom. I do love that each recliner is outfitted with its own faux fur throw blanket, but I’ll keep my distance from those sarcophagi, thank you very much…

The outside feels like the only truly cohesive part of the property. Take a look at the sprawling Romanesque pool and patio.

Sure, it’s over the top, but can’t you see yourself throwing a lavish soiree, complete with the tinkling laughter of the neighborhood’s society ladies as they sip champagne passed by waist-coated waiters? 

No? Me neither, haha, BUT there is a nicely appointed cucina and tons of comfy seating.

Overall, I don’t think I’d give this mansion a second look because the decor makes it super overstimulating. What about you? Would you say yee-haw or yee-nah to this Missoula, Montana mansion? 

‘Til next time!

More Hidden Gems & Outright Disasters

🪄Harry Potter Palaces

15k sqft in NY that will transport you right to the English countryside.

Former Forums

Check out the double toilet in this former Church family center…🚽🚽

⏰ICYMI

I’m told the real sign of wealth in the 1970s was having high-pile plush carpeting all over your home, but this Nova Scotia property takes “wall-to-wall” to a whole new level… it’s covering the actual walls!

In this week’s ICYMI, we’ve got a 3D tour walk-through of one of the most carpeted homes I’ve ever seen (yes, in the kitchen and bathrooms, too). Try not to think too hard about what color these carpet walls started as…

ICYMI, check out the video on Instagram or TikTok, or explore the 3D tour at your own risk!

🗞️Zillowtastrophes in the News

Miami Herald: A ‘warehouse?’ No – it’s a ‘warehome’

SFGate: Perfectly preserved 1960s Palm Springs home goes viral for eccentric interior

SFGate: Even the listing agent thinks the price tag for buzzy Calif. home is too high

EBaumsWorld: A Wine Cellar in the ‘Murder Room’?

Inman News: Real-life ghost stories from really terrified real estate agents (Feat. Mario Umansky claiming he saw Michael Jackson’s ghost?!)

Daily Mail: Sumptuous Palm Springs home with VERY colorful original 1960s interior hits market for $1.85M